From Grief to Belief
Five Years a Friend.
In story five “Bridge Reflections” I told of a time in my life when my brother Gregg took me fishing and how much I benefitted by the time with him, in nature, fishing with a friend. For me it was a time when grief and sadness was transformed into a spiritual awareness that helped me do more than just survive.
I wrote that on that day:
“my soul’s vessel was wrecked, leaking perilously, until in a Zen moment, fishing from a bridge, I saw a bright yellow leaf float out of dark shadows of the bridge tunnel, on sparkling currents of water, into the sunlight and at that moment, I appreciated all the things my father made possible in my life and some beautiful memories flowed on a current of love in my soul.”
I have also written that I believe by faith alone we can see the invisible, believe the unbelievable and receive the impossible.
I remembered the day my brother took me fishing, I was in grief, not strong in my faith and very depressed. My brother had some words of consolation but more importantly he was there for me. He helped me believe I could still enjoy being alive and he reminded me that the best way to honor our father was to be together and to celebrate his life and our lives. He seized the day!
The death of someone close can make a person feel somehow guilty for enjoyment of life because the person they have lost cannot be around to do the same. Also there may be a feeling that society unrealistically expects people to recover from grief as quickly as possible.
My brother Gregg was intuitive in his way of looking at grief. He assessed this emotional test as a painful but necessary process that can also be transformative for the soul. By fishing together, we shared a spiritual time together. In friendship we shared memories and began to change grief into a profound gratitude. Sometimes the best we can do to comfort someone who is grieving is to just be there for them. And if in some way we can remind that person how blessed they were to have the one they loved and lost in their life we have helped a great deal.
My fish’n buddy “Old Paul” lost his daughter in 2013, and also his son many years before. The loss of children may also contributed to his divorce and today he is alone, but he is an optimistic, loving person and it rubs off on me. He has a good spirit that shines on me. He loves animals and fishing! We have been friends for about five years. Thanks for the memories Paul!
I have learned from our friendship that "I am responsible for other human beings simply because they are human beings".
As I reflect upon such experiences I believe: "By Grace, I know what I know, and by Grace, I will do what I can !"